Finding Strength in Each Other: Deepening Family Ties in Hardship

Finding strength in each other can be difficult nowadays. The start of the year challenges us in ways we may not expect. The start often tests our resilience, patience, and relationships.

For families, these hardships can strain bonds or become opportunities to grow closer together.

This blog explores actionable ways to strengthen family bonds during tough times.

Understanding the Impact of Hardship on Families

Stress, uncertainty, and loss often disrupt family dynamics, creating tension and miscommunication.

In the recent news alone, a lot of unexpected things have happened. In the USA, the presidential elections have passed[1], there is a big fire happening in California at the start of January 2025[2]. In the UK, there is a lot of talk about tax and government spending[3]. These news often can bring up emotional responses such as fear, frustration, or grief that impact how family members interact.

Here are some examples:

Nonverbal ways: Nodding your head, maintaining an open posture, and using facial expressions to show you are present and engaged.

Reflecting what is said: Repeating or paraphrasing what the speaker has said to confirm understanding, such as, “What I’m hearing is that you feel overwhelmed about…”

Not making interruptions: Allowing the speaker to finish their thoughts before responding and resisting the urge to interject with advice or solutions immediately.

Asking relevant questions that can be open-ended: Encouraging deeper sharing by asking questions like, “Can you tell me more about …”

Practising active listening shows respect. It also helps family members feel valued and understood. It can help in conflicts resolution, and correct misunderstandings.

Avoiding the Blame Game: Framing Challenges as Shared Problems Rather Than Individual Failures

Blame can quickly escalate tension, stress and create rifts in family relationships, especially during challenging times.

When family members complain and find a lot of faults in one another, it shifts the focus from problem-solving to conflict, making it harder to find solutions.

Instead, reframing challenges as shared problems is better.

Here are ways to avoid the blame game:

Use Language Better: Replace phrases like “You always…” or the worse one “It’s your fault…” or a really bad on “Why are you always doing this, don’t you understand?” Why not replace it with inclusive statements such as “How can we resolve this?” or “What steps can we take to improve this situation?”

Focus on Solutions: Shift conversations away from assigning fault and toward brainstorming actionable steps.

For example, if financial stress arises especially now that is after Christmas, work together to create a budget rather than dwelling on past holiday spending.

Acknowledge Responsibility Together: Recognise that most family challenges result from many different factors, not one person’s actions.

Be Accountable: For instance, be able to say, “I’m sorry for how I reacted; let’s do this and let’s think about how we can get through this.”

Regular Check-Ins or Checks with Family: Setting aside time to discuss emotions and progress. The family can do this maybe after eating dinner and maybe go to the lounge and talk what happened during the day.

Our Experience

In our case, when we started our business in 2006, it was really tough.

We faced financial challenges after a sudden change in job type. Initially, we have fixed income every month. With a fixed income, we can save and budget easily. But with the new business, the income is sporadic. Instead of allowing the stress to divide and consume us both, we implemented weekly family meetings to discuss our financial situation and what we are feeling. We do this every Saturday. We walk to a coffee shop and discuss it. Over time, these became a ritual. People ask us why we do not discuss it at home. Well, for us, a change of location and scenery calms us, and when we discuss heavy topics like this, we approach it rationally.

How do you strengthen bonds?

There are a lot of family counsellors and relationship coaches that are available to help if it gets too much.

Or if there are various ways for nurturing family unity during difficult times:

Shared Rituals or Routines: Establishing routines like family dinners, game nights, or even walks to maintain a sense of normalcy. In our case, we walk to a coffee place here every Saturday. We might miss a few Saturdays when we are travelling, but we always try to sneak this in.

Setting Shared Goals: Working toward common objectives, such as saving money.

Family Meetings: Creating a regular way to discuss challenges, celebrate successes, and plan for the future.

Common Concerns When Finding Strength in Each Other

Families may encounter obstacles when they try finding strength in each other. Past conflicts or issues are a common obstacle. Differing stress coping styles and/or external pressures can make unity feel difficult.

Experts advise focusing on small, manageable steps rather than expecting immediate transformation. For example, starting with a weekly family activity can build momentum over time.

When it gets too much, seeking professional help, such as family counselling or online support, groups, can help and can also provide guidance.

Even after challenges pass, maintaining rituals and open communication helps sustain these connections.

In Conclusion

Hardship is an inevitable thing. |It doesn’t have to weaken family bonds, but it can be a good way of finding strength in each other.

Communicating openly, embracing shared rituals/routines, and supporting one another with empathy, families can grow stronger.

Even small efforts help build resilience and unity. Take the first step this new year. Together, you and your family can overcome anything.